Getting Tuned UP

This morning I heard the morning workers outside starting up their cars and heading out to work. It was 7:00 am and I was still in the horizontal position….meaning I was laying down…with only one eye exposed to the faint hint of sunshine coming in from the windows. Risking only one eye to this early morning event seemed safe enough…so I scanned the room for any signs of someone to help me up….but to no avail. This only left me with one alternative and that was to roll out onto the floor and pull myself up on the edge of the bed.

I know what you are all thinking….Speedy is out of shape….but actually Speedy is trying to get into shape and this is the end results for that. Exercise can kill…don’t let them fool you! You always hear people tell you that you need to stay in shape so you can keep going…well this is true….the getting in shape is what might do you in.

Which makes me think of the ads on TV about the meds they have out there for all of us to use for certain conditions. Have you ever really listened to the after effects that some of these drugs could have on you??? Take Cordialconditional Veinventing Plaxelational Flusher and be guaranteed no cholesterol build up in those pipes of yours….But then the kicker is….Common side effects of this wonder drug are …Watery eyes to the point of blindness….uncontrollable growths of giant moles in places of prominence….excessive body hair…bleeding fissures in rectal areas…uncontrollable bowel movements at inopportune times  and headaches that have been linked to suicides in some individuals.

OK now what moron out there will start taking this drug and not have a worry in the world that none of these side effects will curse them…I guess if you don’t watch the ads and you can’t read then your safe to flush that unwanted cholesterol down the pipes so to speak. I myself will take the chance that exercise and good eating habits will suffice.

One last thing is the Sex enhancing drugs that they have out there.  Causes excruciating headache pain…loss of some of the body senses…to include feel…sight…smell…and the ability to make sound judgment calls….I guess this would account for the two people on the beach setting in separate bathtubs holding hands? I would have to have some other drug involved in this to get Sherri to climb into a tub on the beach and hold hands with me as the sun set on the horizon.

OK nuff said here…I think I have made my point. We are all being led to slaughter by the drug companies when all we have to do is use common sense to take care of our problems. Get lots of exercise eat right and keep your bathtub in the bathroom…believe me all you need is one tub….it is so much more fun…

WOW now Speedy has gone and done it….stepped over the threshold of clean humor into the shady side…HE HE :) I apologize to those of you that take offence to this and from now on I will put up the WARNING sign to lead off my questionable journal entries.

OK I guess this long winded post makes up for me not having any thing to say yesterday. I will close out here with some profound words of wisdom…

Oh I already gave you those….enjoy yourself…

Somewhere in Time